Don't PK the messenger!

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men pass gas more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are ****.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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Those are actually pretty funny.

Too bad you won't live long enough to really appreciate it. :o

lmao.. PK PK *SirElrohir

True story. One time, my entire family was together at my parent's house. My oldest brother (who was the only one married at the time) says, "You know, they say married men live longer."

My dad, without missing a beat says, "No, it just seems that way..."

P.S. My parents had their 50th anniversary early this month.

lmao.. you are too much.

True story. One time, my entire family was together at my parent's house. My oldest brother (who was the only one married at the time) says, "You know, they say married men live longer."

My dad, without missing a beat says, "No, it just seems that way..."

P.S. My parents had their 50th anniversary early this month.

lol, I like your father.

True story. One time, my entire family was together at my parent's house. My oldest brother (who was the only one married at the time) says, "You know, they say married men live longer."

My dad, without missing a beat says, "No, it just seems that way..."

P.S. My parents had their 50th anniversary early this month.

lol, I like your father.



never say that again.

what do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?......

what do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?......

To far....now you and Elro both are getting pk;d

what do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?......

To far....now you and Elro both are getting pk;d


Don't drag me into this. I didn't start it... oh rats.

Thats funny :p

I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are ****.

:)

what do you tell a woman with 2 black eyes?......

Nothing you've already told her twice.

i thought elro's were funny.

as to the other guy:
troglodyte

"I'm lonely", says Adam, in the Garden of Eden.

"I know", says God. "I'll make you the perfect compainion. She'll be smart, ****, and never say a cross word."

"Sounds great", says Adam. "What'll she cost?"

"She'd gonna cost you an arm and a leg." replies God.

"Thats pretty steep. What can I get for a rib?"