In this issue: More Interlude Secrets, Elvis sited, the best new clans to join, how to train bots, and more!
Worst train we saw in months was just south of the cemetary, a feller gathered about 15 of those limping, slow little green aggro men out of the small cemetaries. They walk so slow you can outrun them with an afk store.
Best train we have seen in months, Pavel's Ruins. 'Naughty players' were outside and a Dagger went inside and brought about 20 of the 5x golems and dropped 'em on the cheaters. It was perfect, the two healers kept rezzing the seven DDs until all nine were piled in the dirt. I miss drops on death.
During prime playing time recently our Erica has been 'Normal' not light. Considernig we lost a lot of players to server 10 and that the bannings have removes hundreds, that is nice indeed.
Letters to the Editor:
Reader #1: Dear Rump, there is this DE who is a girl in real life, i saw her picture and she is smart and cute. How can i develop a real relationship with her? I'm a human tank in game.
RP: You can't.
Reader #2: Dear Moron, That was just too slick in the last issue, you posted that V*na is PKing healers then she posts a screenie. I figured it out, YOU ARE V*NA! Gotcha!
RP: Oh come on. Have you ever seen a post by V*na that included a full paragraph? Sheesh.
Reader #3: I think that the EE is wonderful, it makes me laugh so much I spew Pepsi on my keyboard thru my nose.
RP: How charming.
Coming in Interlude:
1. Quests for musical instruments. Clarinets, drums, guitars, banjos, sidras, bagpipes, and grand pianos (for Clan Lords only). Further quests will give you songs which you can play which we will all hear. Have you ever heard "Camptown Racetrack" or "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" on the bagpipes?
2. Swimsuuits, at last! (Yeah, more quests, and fishing)
3. Pet skills, including the oft requested 'lift leg' emote for wolves (must be lvl 50, so get that pup out)
4. Printing presses, the EE will go hardcopy (MSWord) in Interlude.
[Breaking News! In interlude...haircuts will change your locks and....get this....plastic surgery quests! Change your nose, your cheek bones, your lips. DE ladies, get your body parts reduced to reasonable sizes, dwarves get that big butt so it will fit in a strider saddle then get a ***b job so guys will quit looking you in the eyes. Male characters will get mustaches and sideburns now, and hatchlings will get bows to wear on their heads.] End edit.
and more...next issue! Also, time for more 'Personal Matchmaking' so send in your romance ads now!